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(转载) In recent weeks, I have seen reports of two heartbreaking incidents involving young people who died by suicide following alleged school bullying—one aged 12 and another aged 15. Bullying is not “just a normal part of growing up.” It can profoundly affect a child’s confidence, emotional wellbeing and sense of safety. Unfortunately, its seriousness may sometimes be underestimated, particularly within migrant and Asian communities where many parents were raised in a very different social and educational environment. Our children are growing up in a world that may be very different from the one we knew. We must try to understand their experiences, feelings and challenges. Please closely observe your child. If they become unusually quiet, withdrawn, irritable, fearful, tearful, aggressive, reluctant to attend school, or if their sleep, appetite, friendships or academic performance suddenly change, do not simply dismiss their behaviour or respond with anger. Pause. Listen. Speak gently. Ask what they are going through and reassure them that they can talk to you without fear of being judged or punished. Healthy boundaries remain important, but connection and emotional safety must come first. If you are concerned: Talk openly and calmly with your child. Contact their teacher, school counsellor or wellbeing team. Speak with your GP about available psychological and mental health support. Seek professional help early—early intervention can make a significant difference. Teach children how to recognise bullying, seek help and safely support others. Take any mention of self-harm, suicide or feeling hopeless seriously. Parents and caregivers often notice subtle changes before anyone else. Trust your instincts. Know your child’s strengths and vulnerabilities, remain involved in their lives, and regularly remind them that they are loved, valued and never alone. If a child is in immediate danger or has expressed an intention to harm themselves, please call emergency services or take them to the nearest emergency department immediately. Within the limits of my professional knowledge, I am always happy to guide families towards appropriate support. Most importantly, please stay connected with your children, listen without judgement and make home a safe place for difficult conversations. May God protect all our children from bullying, cruelty and harm. May He keep them safe and always surround them with His mercy and blessings. 近期看到两起令人痛心的报道：两名分别只有12岁和15岁的孩子，在疑似遭受校园欺凌后自杀离世。 校园欺凌绝不是“成长过程中很正常的小事”。它可能严重伤害孩子的自信、情绪健康和安全感。尤其在一些移民和亚裔家庭中，父母成长的社会与教育环境与现在截然不同，有时可能低估欺凌对孩子的影响。 我们的孩子正在一个与我们童年完全不同的世界里成长。我们需要努力理解他们所经历的事情、感受和压力。 请留意孩子是否出现以下变化： 突然变得沉默、退缩、易怒、害怕或爱哭； 无故出现攻击性行为； 不愿意或害怕上学； 睡眠、食欲发生明显变化； 朋友关系或学习成绩突然改变。 如果发现这些迹象，请不要简单斥责，也不要认为孩子只是在“闹情绪”。 先停下来，耐心倾听，温和询问孩子正在经历什么。让他们知道：无论发生什么，都可以放心地告诉父母，不会因此受到指责、评判或惩罚。 规则和界限依然重要，但亲子连接和情绪安全应当放在首位。如果您感到担忧，可以： 平静、坦诚地与孩子交谈； 联系老师、学校心理辅导员或学生关怀团队； 咨询家庭医生，了解心理健康方面的支持； 尽早寻求专业帮助——早期干预可能带来很大的不同； 教会孩子识别欺凌、主动求助，并在保证自身安全的前提下帮助他人； 认真对待孩子任何有关自伤、自杀或“活着没有希望”的表达。 父母和照护者往往最先发现孩子细微的变化。请相信自己的直觉，了解孩子的长处和脆弱之处，持续参与他们的生活，并经常告诉他们： 你被爱着，你很重要，你永远不是一个人。 如果孩子正处于紧急危险之中，或者明确表达了伤害自己的意图，请立即拨打紧急服务电话，或带孩子前往最近的医院急诊科。 在我的专业知识范围内，我也非常愿意帮助家长寻找合适的支持。最重要的是，请与孩子保持连接，不带评判地倾听，让家成为他们能够安心谈论困难的地方。 愿老天爷保佑所有孩子远离欺凌、恶意与伤害，愿他们平安成长，永远被慈悲与祝福环绕。 要点总结 欺凌不是小事：它会严重影响孩子的自信、心理健康和安全感。 留意异常变化：沉默退缩、易怒恐惧、拒绝上学，以及睡眠、食欲、交友或成绩改变。 先倾听，别急着批评：温和询问，让孩子确信说出真相不会受到责备。 连接先于管教：界限仍然需要，但孩子的情绪安全应放在首位。 尽早寻求帮助：联系学校、家庭医生和心理健康专业人员。 认真对待危险信号：任何自伤、自杀或绝望的表达都不能忽视。 紧急情况立即行动：拨打急救电话或前往医院急诊。 让家成为安全的地方：经常告诉孩子——你被爱、你很重要、你并不孤单。 |
